I want to be posting more, but the thought of writing out a bunch of paragraphs seems daunting. But if I put it in a bulleted list, it’s like I’m just jotting stuff down and TOTALLY not REAL writing, right?


  • ¬†At 2 1/2, Raelin is pretty much fully potty trained. It took about a week. It was so painless that I’m wondering what the catch is. I still have flashbacks to trying to potty train Rory at 3 1/2 and begging her to JUST POOP ALREADY!
  • For the past few months, I’ve been attempting to get healthier as I crawl out of the depression that was making me eat my feelings and never leave the couch. I started by tracking my calories on MyFitnessPal, and in May I started P90X3. I’ve lost around 8 pounds, 2 inches in my hips, and 4 inches in my waist. I’ve gained so much muscle, especially in my legs, that I’m constantly poking at them in wonder and awe. I still have a ways to go and I get impatient and have “fat days” where I feel like it’s never going to go away. But I didn’t grow this fupa overnight and it’s not going to go away overnight. And sometimes I just need a cheeseburger. For reasons.
  • I still get sad that R.E.M. broke up.
  • I cancelled my Spotify premium subscription and signed up to get Ipsy makeup bags instead. I’m working on accepting that people change, including me, and if I want to be more girly I don’t have to be ashamed of it and it doesn’t mean I have to be labeled a certain way or change who I am just because I put some effing bronzer on. That said, they sent me deep tanning oil and I’m like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME AT ALL?!? Also, I reeeeally miss Spotify Premium.
  • This is my living room right now. #sendhelpIMG_0010
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A Raelin Update

In my last update about Raelin, when she had just turned one, I talked about how she was nothing but trouble, and I can report that at two and a half, she remains trouble. She is SUCH a two year old, from the not listening, to the saying NO to everything, to refusing to eat almost everything, to the random tantrums for the dumbest reasons. I’ve taken to posting on Facebook with the reasons for her current fit of anger, and it makes me happy when it resonates with other parents. Like mine is not the only one who flies into a blind rage when you give her the wrong colored utensil at breakfast.

She is also much more independent than Rory ever was. She’s always been that way, and maybe it has something to do with being a second child. She will play on her own with toys, her current favorites being, of course, her little Disney princess dolls. She’ll play with them in the castle and give them little voices and conversations and it’s adorable. She also loves to dress up, and is full on obsessed with shoes. By the end of the day, every pair of shoes we own is scattered about the house because she’s put them on and then discarded them for another pair. She and Rory will sometimes play together, but there is so much screaming and fighting between the two of them. In the times when they get along, they will reenact scenes from Frozen because they have the thing damn near memorized.

Raelin is strong willed and difficult sometimes, but she’s also so sweet and curious and silly. She looks up to her big sister so much and wants to do all the things she does (and she calls her “Ror” which kills me). She has boundless energy and is always climbing on things and/or jumping off things. Still no broken bones but I’m not super confident that will remain true. She speeds along on her scooter, is getting faster and faster on her balance bike, and scales playground structures like they’re nothing. She has no fear in her swimming classes and is always the most enthusiastic one, leaping into the water with an ungraceful flourish and paddling away. She definitely keeps me on my toes, but I think that’s good for me.


Raelin – Age 2 1/2

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A Rory Update

Where to start? Rory, my first born, my BAY-BEE, she is but a few short months from turning five. Last week, we took her to kindergarten round-up and got her registered for real, actual school, which is blowing my mind. I’m alternately excited and terrified to send her off to kindergarten. I know she is smart enough and that she will be going to a great school, but thinking about putting her on a school bus with a backpack and lunch box and watching her ride away to a full day of class… just… what? Already?! I’ve got the vapors just thinking about it.

Rory loves to play with other kids. She is very difficult to keep entertained when she’s on her own. She thrives on being social and will talk to anyone who will listen to her. And she never. stops. talking. Everything is prefaced by “You know what?” or “I have to tell you something.” All day long. She’s observant and has a lot of questions and it really is endearing, but by mid-day I feel like I’ve answered all the questions in the universe and how could she possibly have anything else to say? She’s recently been asking a lot of questions about death, which has been… fun.

She is, despite the lack of an example from me, a major girly-girl. She loves dresses, bows, frilly things, and has many opinions about how her hair should be done. She loves to put on her play makeup. She is constantly twirling and making up graceful dance routines, and has been taken by the Disney princess sickness, which no Batman toy or Star Wars book has a chance of curing. I’m sure our nerdy influence will rub off on her at some point (she does love board games and playing Peggle on the xBox). And if not, well… she’s her own person, and I’m sure I could be a dance mom if I had to. But I draw the line at pageants.

Rory - Age 4 1/2

Rory – Age 4 1/2

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*tap tap tap* Helloooo?

Should we talk about how I haven’t posted since 2012? Or should we just chalk it up to some glitch in the space-time continuum and agree that really I just posted yesterday, but something went wonky with time? Sure, let’s go with that.

Life got kind of weird and overwhelming for a while there, and I started suffering from a case of “nobody gives a shit about my boring life” and so I abandoned this blog. I’ve been in a darkish place emotionally for a long time and was starting to feel rather hopeless about ever feeling good again, so I started seeing a therapist for the first time in my life. So now I pay someone to listen to me talk about my boring life, and she thinks it would be good for me to start blogging again. So here I am!

I don’t really want to get into all the specifics of my “issues”, but I do feel like I’m getting to a better place. I need to start taking care of myself again, to lose the weight I gained whilst depressed, and to find things that make me happy and fulfilled and less like a sad blob whose only purpose is to keep small people alive and clean things. I’m going to start taking piano lessons in April, and I’m getting more into genealogy (my old person hobby). Progress!

Also, the last time I posted was when Raelin had just turned one, and now she is pushing two and a half, and Rory is just a few months from five. WHAT?! Updates on them coming soon, including my emotional breakdown about having to sign Rory up for kindergarten next month.

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Raelin – 12 Months

I suppose I’ve come to terms with the fact that my baby is a year old. She’s definitely not slowing down at all, and is more of a toddler than a baby now, anyway. If I was to describe Raelin in one word, it would be MENACE. She is cute and smart and funny and all that fun baby stuff, but the girl is TROUBLE.

If something can be climbed, she will climb it. If it can’t be climbed, she will push something over to it in order to make it climbable. If something fits in her mouth, she will eat it, edible or not. I swear she has a sixth sense about when a door is left open that we usually keep closed, and she’s in there before I even notice she’s gone. I’m constantly chasing her away from the cats’ water dish, and out of the laundry room, out of the fireplace, and out of the garbage can (that she figured out how to open).

We are still nursing. I wasn’t planning on cutting her off any time soon, because we had been down to just nursing at night. But ever since she got a fever and a nasty cold a week ago, she’s been wanting to nurse all the time (usually letting me know by sticking her hand directly down my cleavage or yanking my shirt down in front of strangers). I know it’s good for her to get antibodies and such, so I’m going with it. For now.

She had a great first birthday party with family, and thoroughly enjoyed herself. She got really excited about her presents, which I didn’t expect from a one year old. She also completely devoured her little smash cake in a glorious explosion of crumbs and frosting.

Favorites: pushing a little doll stroller all over the house, looking at the family photos on the wall, carrying bags and purses, climbing on top of tables, opening and closing doors, pretending to talk on phones, her kiddie gym class, baths, snuggling with Daddy, laundry baskets, stealing juice from her sister, and babies. She says hi to practically everybody, so is not particularly put off by strangers. She can also say mama, baba usually means baby, and dada means just about everything else.


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